The other day, I was chatting with my youngest daughter, asking her how gymnastics was going, expecting the usual polite shrug or a vague “It’s fine.” But she came at me with raw, unfiltered truth—none of that Instagram-ready highlight reel. She told me about her teammates, the coaches, and, without hesitation, the lingering fear that continues to creep due to her recently breaking her wrist on a nasty fall off the beam. Her honesty caught me off guard, a reminder that sometimes the bravest thing you can do is just be exactly where you are, even if that place feels wobbly.
See, authenticity isn’t just something we toss into Instagram captions next to latte art. It’s alignment—between what you think, say, and do—so your insides and outsides match up. It’s knowing who you are, quirks and contradictions included, and showing up as that person, even when the world would prefer you pick a lane and stay there. It’s not about being flawless. It’s about being consistent, which, frankly, is much harder. Perfect is impossible, but honest? Now, that’s within reach.
Living authentically is like wearing a coat with the tag still on the outside: uncomfortable at first, but eventually, you stop fidgeting and let people deal with it. You say the thing that needs saying, even if it doesn’t win you any applause. You show up with your awkwardness, your bad days, your second-guessing. And in a world that’s busy selling curated versions of self—polished highlight reels and manicured facades—being real is an act of quiet rebellion. You build trust, not just with others but with yourself, which might be the trickiest relationship of all.
And yeah, authenticity asks for more than most of us are prepared to give on a Tuesday morning. It requires vulnerability—something most of us avoid like we avoid making eye contact with the neighbor we borrowed a lawnmower from six months ago and never returned. But in exchange for that discomfort, it gives you freedom. Freedom from the exhausting hustle of pretending to be something you’re not. Freedom to connect with others, not as the person you think they want, but as who you already are.
So, how do you do it? Start with the basics. Know your N.U.T.s—Non-Negotiable, Unalterable Terms (shoutout to Wayne Levine for that little gem). What’s sacred to you? What will you absolutely not compromise on, even if it makes you unpopular at dinner parties? Own your story, even the parts you’d prefer stayed buried in your junior high diary. And surround yourself with people who don’t flinch when you let your guard down. They’re your people, not just the audience for the highlight reel.
Authenticity isn’t some lofty ideal you climb toward—it’s the person staring back at you in the mirror. The only real question is: Are you brave enough to introduce them to the world?
